Monthly Archives: September 2012

State of the Uterus Address – Week 15 #iPPP

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I’ve always been a somewhat lumpy lady. I got boobs in 4th grade, and I can’t remember a time when I didn’t have a chunky butt. But there’s only been one other time in my life when I carried a round mound in the middle and that was back in 2010:

LOOK. HOW. PREGNANT.

I was huge. It was awesome. I mean, not so much for my hips and back, which ached like you would not believe, but awesome because I felt like I had grown a big, healthy baby.

This time around, things seem to be progressing at the slowest pace possible when it comes to the baby bump. We find out the sex in a few weeks and that seems strange, to almost be halfway and to still look like maybe I just had too many cheeseburgers at lunch.

So here it is, 15 weeks along (well, 14 weeks and some odd days when I snapped this).

You tell me: baby? Or fat?

Link up with Greta and me for this week’s #iPPP!

We always have a lot of fun with this each week, and you will too.



Mamamash
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#iPPP: What we brought back from Texas

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We packed light for the trip to Texas a couple of weeks ago, having finally figured out that we’d be sent back with a ton of random cargo.

This time?

A bunch of cute new clothes, including Cars pajamas and matching slippers. Way, way too cute. (And perfectly timed, since the weather cooled off quite a bit all of a sudden.)

Football gnomes from our creative shopping addict uncle! (Hey Chiefs? You could totally put this lil’ guy in and he’d probably perform better on defense than what ya’ got goin’ on right now. Just sayin’.)

And, my favorite…

VERY important parenting advice. Because although our children might have entered the world in Missour-ah, we will eventually migrate back to the Lone Star State.

I’m already sure to practice new vocabulary words with an accent, just so Monkey knows how to properly pronounce pie (PAH) and y’all. Also, we play the Aggie War Hymn over and over again to the new fetus so he/she will know what’s really going on. (And by we I mean me, because if my husband had his way our second born’s first words would be something about booming too soon. Or something. Ahem.)

Whatchoo’ been up to this week? Share your camera phone photos with us!



Mamamash
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Salutations! #iPPP

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Last week, a snake slithered across my naked toes and surprisingly, I did not suffer a myocardial infarction. I did flip him off, but only after the cheeky little guy turned around and stuck his tongue out at me.

So, I’m not too squeamish about reptiles. Or vermin, for that matter. I’ll totally pick up that mouse that’s terrorizing you in the kitchen.

But there is one order of animals I cannot stand, and that’s spiders.

Yes, I know they eat bugs, and bugs are annoying. Yes, I know they provide food for birds, and birds are beautiful.

I don’t care. I’ve had one shower with me. I’ve had one visit me while I was on the toilet. I’ve had one crawl into bed with me.

Look, guys, I have a space bubble. I have intimacy issues.

And spiders are just prone to getting way too personal.

So it’s strange that two years ago, when this lady set up housekeeping outside our front door, we didn’t bother her. In fact, we fussed at visitors who insisted we sweep her away, or squash her.

She stayed for a couple of months, keeping our porch bug-free and spinning beautiful new webs each morning. We took to calling her Charlotte.

Look, I never said we were original.

Anyway, when she went away at the start of winter, we were kind of sad. We knew she’d laid her last clutch of eggs and died at the first frost. Like Wilbur, we were somewhat lost without her constant presence.

Last year, we waited anxiously to see if any of her progeny might return. Not one orb weaver could be spotted anywhere in our yard, which was strange. Normally we have half a dozen or so.

Fast forward to present day. When we returned from Texas Sunday evening, we were greeted by the sight of something that might make most people cringe.

But we were overjoyed. Our eight-legged gargoyle – she was back. Reincarnated maybe, likely even offspring of our original Charlotte. And while she’ll probably skeeve out the postman, she might also discourage the solicitors – and that’s fine by us.

The seasons are changing! Did you snap a pic of your Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte? Are the leaves turning already in your neighborhood? Show us your camera phone pics from this week!



Mamamash
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Pop the Patriarch turns 80

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Sometimes when things come together, it’s luck – like my husband needing to go to Texas for work at the same time I needed to go to Texas for a family gathering. He didn’t have to use any vacation days and I didn’t have to drive myself!

But most of the time when things come together it’s because a bunch of people worked their asses off to get it done.

My grandfather’s 80th birthday was last week and my entire family worked closely together to plan a fantastic celebration. From compiling a guest list and sending out invitations and request for letters detailing memories from my grandfather’s past to buying, prepping and cooking enough food for a gaggle of people to providing technical support – we all pitched in.

And what a success! Even with the snags along the way (food warmers that didn’t work, obnoxious building personnel) the party was a happy, sentimental affair.

Folks from all over the country sent in letters for my grandfather telling him about their favorite memory of him. His high school class was very helpful with this. They’re such a close bunch and that makes me happy.

We had guests attend from near and far, and we were so grateful for them all for making the trip.

There had been talk of getting a recliner for my grandfather to sit in to receive guests, but I don’t think his rear end touched even a plastic chair once that day. He went from table to table, from crowd to crowd visiting with his well-wishers and it made my heart grow about 10 times to see the smile on his face the entire day. (And of course I cried when I presented him with the stack of letters. I’ll blame it on pregnancy hormones.)

And although the joy of seeing all these smiling faces was pretty much just indescribable, my favorite part of the afternoon was when everyone was getting ready to leave and several of us stayed back to clean.

Without even being asked, my cousins jumped in to clear tables, put away food and mop the floor. My husband threw knives to pop balloons that had gotten stuck up too high for us to retrieve them. (This was quite the spectacle to behold.) In less than an hour, we had the venue back to its original form. We laughed and cut up along the way, and I was just so in love with my family right then.

Sometimes I worry about my generation of our family – that we’ll lose touch as the older generations pass on. But after Saturday I don’t see that happening. We work together so well and genuinely enjoy each other’s company. I love these guys and look forward to the day when we can get together much more often.

Here’s to you, Sucker-Wielding Bank Lady! #iPPP

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Our bags are packed, the housesitter is prepped and in a few short hours we are headed south for a few days of fun at the lake, a huge family birthday bash and some serious seafood eating.

I can’t wait. I’m revved up like a kid at Christmas.

But unlike a kid at Christmas, today I had to do all the work that comes before such an awesome experience.

The packing, the shopping, the cleaning…ugh.

Monkey stomped about behind me all morning, chanting, “I help! I help!” as I threw clothes into bags and sorted what toiletries to take.

He “helped” make the beds with fresh linens. He “helped” fold the clothes into neat piles so they’d fit into suitcases. He “helped” put away all the clutter throughout the house.

And of course by “helped” I mean, “undid everything I did with a ornery albeit dimply grin.”

So of course it took twice as long, but he was happy and felt important so I count it as a successful day.

In the midst of all the “helping,” we had to run to town to pick up the bagels my housesitter loves and to visit the bank. I wasn’t keen on bringing Monkey into a crowded restaurant during lunch hour, so I dropped him off at a friend’s house on the way for a mini play date.

When I picked him up a short time later, he was flushed and happy. He did not want to leave, but after a bit of coaxing I got him to the door. He waved as we went down the steps, all “Bye! Bye! See you next time! Bye!”

I got him buckled into his carseat and could see he was getting a little droopy, but we still had another errand to run. I prayed for no “I’m missing my nap” meltdowns and scooted off to the bank.

While I was taking care of my banking, Monkey began to squawk. Quietly, petulantly at first, then letting out cries that sounded like someone was tickling a toucan.

Bank lady to the rescue, y’all! She sent me that manna from the vacuum-tube heavens – the sucker.

We barely made it to the stop light down the road before someone lulled himself into high-fructose-corn-syrup nirvana. Eyes rolled back in his head, lashes fluttering, blue drool staining his shirt, he slept.

What beautiful moments did you catch with your camera phone this week?

Link up your posts with #iPPP!



Mamamash
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