*Warning – Kind of a bummer
Monday was a dark day. The clouds hung gray and bleak in the sky, a fitting background for everything that was happening.
There’s been so much loss in the last week. Today my uncle buries his mother, a beautiful person who treated my aunt like a daughter and their dogs like grandchildren. One close friend suddenly, shockingly lost her brother, a handsome, charming man who was known and loved by pretty much an entire town. Another friend is saying goodbye to her uncle, who leaves behind a large clan to mourn him.
And then Sunday, my husband’s fraternity brother lost his wife and their daughter in childbirth.
In childbirth. In America. In the 21st century.
It still happens.
My husband found out in the middle of the night and took the news alone and very hard. Unbeknownst to me, he’d been up all night with our son who kept waking up crying. While I slept in my Unisom preggo coma, hubs was rocking and patting and soothing our little two-year-old boy and helping to organize the group of grieving fraternity brothers as they tried to decide how to best pay their respects.
What could they possibly say in a situation like that? What comfort can you bring to a man who was about to experience life’s greatest joy and it turned into life’s worst horror?
There was so much sadness and fear in my husband’s eyes yesterday. I could see him drawing parallels in his mind. When he looked at me, I felt like he was seeing a ticking time bomb.
All day long he sat in his chair, fielding messages from other brothers and fighting tears, the reality of it all hitting much too close to home.
My husband is a strong, stoic kind of man. He rarely loses his temper or sheds a tear. I have only recently seen him provoked to rage, and we’ve been together for five years. He’s handled so much pressure, forgiven so many offenses and weathered so many storms.
I worry that his reserve of strength is beginning to dwindle. Normally when one of us falters, the other one is always there to pick up the slack, but I’m so exhausted myself right now. I worry that I’m going to let him down.
It’s during these times that we lean into each other and upon our faith and wait for better days. It’s in these times that even small moments of embrace and connection can make a world of difference. It’s at this time that we are so grateful for our little boy and the moments of levity he provides.
Even in the darkness, we are so blessed.
What photographs of your blessings did you catch this week? Link up and share them!
Really, I need to see some happy.
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