When we went to Texas last month, my husband whined mentioned to my grandmother that he’d been fighting the same sinus irritation and post-nasal drip for several weeks.
My grandparents were thrilled.
What’s so exciting about snot, you ask?
Well, my grandparents are evangelical neti pot converts, eager to convince owners of virgin nostrils that shoving the tip of a plastic watering can up said nostrils then irrigating the innocent sinuses within is the only way to nose nirvana.
You’ll meet a lot of people like this nowadays. They’ll extol the virtues of saline, swear by their own battery-powered (!!!) nasal cavity pressure washer and make fun of you for being a sissy for not trying it.
Well ‘scuse me, but Mama taught me at a young age not to stick things in my nose and she was right about most stuff, so I’m gonna pass.
My husband, however, was so desperate to be able to breathe normally that he willingly subjected himself to a nasal douching aided by my sweet granny.
And he did in fact enjoy the experience so much that he had me purchase for him his own little pot and packets of cleansing powder to take back to Kansas City with us.
It’s not a grievous hyperbolization to say that there have been several times over the last few weeks where I’ve wanted to drown my husband in the toilet after listening to him gurgle and hack after flooding his sinuses.
As much as I hate listening to the noises he makes while observing his new ritual, it’s nothing compared to how grossed out one of his employees was the other day, although she handled it much better than I would have.
Something had gone wrong with that morning’s nose watering. Saline went in, but saline did not come out. No amount of glugging or snarfing would get his head to drain.
I might have giggled a bit as he left for work.
While performing his duties later that morning, some of which require bending over, he was overcome with the urge to sneeze.
With his head lowered, he took a deep breath in preparation for that sneeze and was shocked when his nose unleashed a massive, salty splat of saline and snot upon the floor.
His employee, while surely disgusted, remained professional and merely said, “Neti pot, huh?”
I stringently object to the normalization of this practice, so I turned to the internet for support.
Only, it seems as if the rest of you people have been drinking the kool aid as well.
Observe:
Dana K over at Really, What Were We Thinking (Makes it look cute with her adorable accent. )
And
Poppy at Funny or Snot (The first I’d ever heard of a battery-powered nasal assault weapon. Also gets credit for coining the phrase “nasal douche.”
What about you? Are you a believer?
No no no!! A thousand times NO!!
I’ve heard they’re amazing, but I think I’ll pass! However, this is an absolutely hysterical post!
My husband does it sometimes, when not lazy, at the orders of his allergist. It works up to a point, The packets are just remeasured salt that is formulated to dissolve quickly. I havent worked up the courage to try it. I have seen the doesnt come back out trick. That is when your sinuses are really bad. Dr said just keep doing it. I think I will stick to my steaming hot showers and nose blowing thank you very much.
I’ve heard about it but believe it’s not available here in Malaysia AND THANK GOODNESS FOR THAT.
Hahahaha! Neti pots rock! I am giving my 14 yr old son one for Christmas because he keeps borrowing mine! GROSS!!! To think I used to kiss his toes!!!
Kimberly (avid yogi)
First of all, LOVE the title. Pure genius. And the line about your grandparents being thrilled. Ha!!
Secondly, aw HAYLE no. I drank the saline Kool-Aid through my nose once…just once. Naturally, something went very very wrong and I ended up with water in my ear canal that I couldn’t remove, no matter how I twisted my body or blew or snarfed. That led to me trying “Ear Candles” like the sweet little man at the health food store suggested. Jump to the punch line and a few days later I was seeing an ENT for my damn ear infection who basically bitch slapped me for sticking anything other than my elbow into my ears. So no, I’ll never neti OR use ear candles again!
As a chronic allergy and sinus infection sufferer, I’m constantly ordered to use a neti pot every day. And truth be told …. I hate it. I hate the feeling of water sloshing in and out of my nose, I hate how it makes me a drippy mess the rest of the day, and did I mention how much I hate feeling water slosh around through my nose and sinuses? Right. No neti pot for me.
This is hilarious!! You are brave people. I have some opinions about the netty pot (and BTW, the title was LOL!). I believe it is a good thing, but I have not tried it. I am holding on to resentment at my doctor for only suggesting a netty pot when I had a 104 fever for four days and ended up in the hospital with the flu. Fuck the netty pot. Sorry. But, I’m a little bitter.
Ha! Hilarious. I always chuckle when I hear about people using a Neti pot – especially for the first time. I’ve was so miserable with my sinuses one time that I have finally caved and gave the Neti pot a whirl! Hell… at that point I was willing to try anything for a little relief. OMG – it SUCKED!! I remember it burnt like the dickens; but did provide momentary relief. Not very long though. I’d have to be in pretty much pain to go there again.
Oh my goodness! NO!!! I cannot imagine going through with that!
Nasal douche may be the funniest gross thing EVA!
I LOVE THE NETI!!! Thanks for the shout out. I still don’t understand where all the sounds are coming from with your husband. I think you need to record it. Maybe I can help with his technique?
I’m with you, girlfriend, I find it disgusting!
I’m also sad that you were in Texas and I missed you! How is that possible, it’s not such a big place, we should have definitely run into each other.
Tears! TEARS I have, I’m laughing so hard at this! I am not a convert, though many in my extended family have been. The zeal is only marginally less remarkable than their snot production. I will be sure to stand well clear whenever any one of them looks about to sneeze!
I have a neti pot that I got from BlogHer still sitting in the box. I had no idea how they worked until I saw Dana’s video. Not sure it’s something I want to try.
I’m totally a believer in them. I use it all the time if I’m sick. I love what happened at work – I would totally do something like that as well after using it.
I’ve heard of them and several people I know love them. I haven’t tried it yet though–I’m waiting for B to try it first. ha!
I think I’m gonna be sick now. I have no idea how his employee was so calm about that!
I have heard so much about them, but until Dana’s video I had no idea how they worked. After watching hers and hearing about your husband blow out, I’m afraid to try it.
hahaha I neti pot from time to time, but only when I’m desperate. Although, I can say that the saline has gotten stuck for me too. It’s a terrible feeling. Like you’re drowning in your own sinus passages. Ick. I just grossed myself out. Sorry!
Sorry dude.
They got me a couple years ago when I was in the throes of a bad sinus infection.
It worked like a charm
LOL for real.
I tried the neti pot when I was pregnant and couldn’t use anything else. Apparently, for some people, it can run into their ears. Never again. Never, Never, Never.
I have one that I got for free from a facebook offer or something, like a year ago. But I have yet to use it. I think it would be really good for me right now….but I’m scared.
My husband believes in those things…I however am not a convert. I’m scared!
Every day, glands in the lining of your nose, throat, airways, stomach, and intestinal tract produce about 1 to 2 quarts of mucus — a thick, wet substance that moistens these areas and helps trap and destroy foreign invaders like bacteria and viruses before they can get into your body and cause infection. Normally, you don’t notice the mucus from your nose because it mixes with saliva and drips harmlessly down the back of your throat to be swallowed gradually and continuously throughout the day.’
Up to date post on our very own web blog
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